Sunday, October 31st, 2010

Time	Event
5:51a	@@@@@ The Ilse shambling toward me was made of @@@@@ The Ilse shambling toward me was made of sandHer voice was dry, with a grating undertone - as if there were shells caught in there somewhereI supposed there were You will want to, but you mustn't, Elizabeth had saidbut sometimes we can't help ourselves The sand-girl held out her armThe wind gusted and the fingers at the end of the hand blurred as fine grains blew off them and thinned them to bonesMore sand skirled up from around her and the hand fattened againHer features shifted like a landscape under rapidly passing summer clouds "Give me the flashlight," she said"Then we'll go on board togetherOn the ship I can be the way 1102 you remember meyou don't have to remember anything The waves were on the marchUnder the stars they roared in, one after the other Under Big Pink, the shells spoke loudly: my voice, arguing with itselfHere in front of me stood Ilse made of sand, a shifting houri by the light of a three-quarter moon, her features never the same from one second to the nextNow she was Illy at nine; now she was Illy at fifteen, headed out on her first real date; now she was Illy as she'd looked getting off the plane in December, Illy the college girl with an engagement ring on her finger Here stood the one I'd always loved the best - wasn't that why Perse had killed her? - with her hand held out for the flashlightThe flashlight was my boarding pass for a long cruise on forgetful seasOf course that part might be a liebut sometimes we have to take a chanceAs Wireman says, we fool ourselves so much we could do it for a living "Mary brought salt with her," I said"Bags and bags of sal (Comment on this)
12:00p	@@@@@ I listened to the fading sound of his @@@@@ I listened to the fading sound of his footsteps until they were goneThen, forgetting Jeb's existence, I pressed my face into my hands and sobbed CHAPTER 20 Freed Jeb let me cry myself out without interruptingHe didn't comment all through the following snifflesIt was only when I'd been completely silent for a good half hour that he spoke “Still awake in there?” I didn't answerI was too much in the habit of silence “You want to come out here and stretch?” he offered“My back is aching just thinking about that stupid hole Ironically, considering my week of maddening silence, I wasn't in the mood for companyBut his offer wasn't one I could refuseBefore I could think about it, my hands were pulling me through the exit Jeb was sitting with crossed legs on the matI watched him for some reaction as I shook out my arms and legs and rolled my shoulders, but he had his eyes closedLike the time of Jamie's visit, he looked asleep How long had it been since I'd seen Jamie? And how was he now? My already sore heart gave a painful little lurch “Feel better?” Jeb asked, his eyes opening “It's going to be okay, you know He grinned a wide, face-stretching grin“That stuff I said to Jared… Well, I won't say Ilied, exactly, because it's all true if you look at it from a certain angle, but from another angle, it wasn't so much the truth as it was what he needed to hear I just stared; I didn't understand a word of what he was saying “Anyway, Jared needs a break from thisNot from you, kid,” he added quickly, “but from the situationHe'll gain some perspective while he's away I wondered how he seemed to know exactly which words and phrases would cut at (Comment on this)

<< Previous Day

2010/10/31 [Calendar]

Next Day >>